53 Million Votes…

…you mean nothing to me. I suppose this goes to show that just because there’s a quantity of something doesn’t mean there’s a quality. But we should back up a wee bit.

Last night (as on most Thursday nights) I was at worship team practice, minding my own business when I got this text from Renee.

Renee: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: WHO??????

Me: I can take it

Renee: SOMEONE I DIDN’T EXPECT!!!!

ME: I need a name!

Renee: A boy…

Renee: Not Phillip

And this is where I’ll stop because there’s still a show to recap. But suffice it to say, for Renee–an editorial assistant–to make such liberal use of exclamations is kind of a big deal. And this conversation kind of sums up my reaction to tonight’s eliminated contestant.

I spied Taylor Hicks in the audience before our top 7 took the stage for their group number. But I’m just wondering…are there any Taylor Hicks fans still out there? If there are, they must have gone into deep hiding is all I’m sayin’.

Top 7 Perform “Dancin’ in the Street”

This was a pretty solid performance from our remaining Idol contestants, so I don’t have much to say. But it did seem as though Jessica’s mic wasn’t on for her first few little solos. Or maybe it was just too low for her and therefore hard for us to hear.

About halfway through the song I finally noticed the guy in the background spinning on his head and doing other break dance-y kind of moves. And after I noticed that, it was hard to concentrate on anything else. UNTIL I noticed that one of the girl dancers had either lavender or blue lipstick on. And then, all of a sudden, there were balloons all over the place.

So, I guess my experience with this performance can kind of be summed up in one statement. “Ooo! Shiny!”

Results for Joshua and Hollie

Joshua according to Jimmy: He did himself good by staying in his sweet spot.  If he keeps doing what he’s doing he could end up in the finale.

Hollie according to Jimmy: She came out of her shell but she has a long road if she wants to make it to the finale.

Verdict: Despite Ry-Ry’s trickiness, Joshua is safe. Hollie in the bottom three.

[Side note: And now we learn that the reason that Taylor Hicks is in the audience is to promote his very ambiguous and not at all appealing-sounding Vegas show. I suppose the producers had to throw him a bone since he did technically win his season. I just wish this Taylor, older and wiser than he was on his season, would learn how to do a proper intro. Yelling “KRIS ALLEN” is not really what we were looking for there. But luckily, Ryan agreed with me and gave my favorite winner of Idol his fair introduction.]

Kris Allen Performs “Vision of Love”

I’m very familiar with the song, having downloaded it back in March so I just enjoyed watching the performance as a whole. That was a super duper cool piano that would go GREAT with my decor…though moving a piano into a basement would probably provide some challenges that I’d rather not deal with.

I did get a little bit dizzy watching Kris Allen spin round and round whilst he played and sang. And if I felt that way, I have some sympathy in my heart for Kris and also the camera men assigned to record this little item for us viewers at home. Maybe Ryan can ask Kieren the light guy to take them out for a cupcake or something.

I do think his stage presence has really grown, as has his person style. I just love his authenticity and mellow vibe.

Results for Skylar and Elise

According to Jimmy:

Both did Marvin Gaye songs, Skylar delivered and Elise fell flat.

For Elise to be in the finale, she has to find a potent rock song that she can deliver authentically and deliver it like she did the Led Zeppelin song. Skylar gets better every week and she’s the best performer we’ve got.

After Jimmy threw in his two cents, Ryan asked Elise if she feels like the judges are harder on her. And she proceeded to go on and on about how mean they are and that she gets so down, etc etc. She needs to filter and get on board the happy train! I have no idea how she’s escaped elimination thus far with how many times she’s been in the bottom three. Save your sob story, Testone!

Verdict: Skylar is safe; Elise is in the bottom three.

LMFAO Performs “Sorry for Party Rocking”

I think I do own one LMFAO song that has taken up permanent residence on my work-out mix. But that’s all their songs are really good for. And this song wasn’t really good for anything. I think that much could pretty much be surmised when the dancing zebra took the stage.

I fast-forwarded the rest of it.

Results for Phillip, Colton, and Jessica

Jessica According to Jimmy: She’s singing songs too old for her and people don’t relate. Jimmy’s going to try to fix that.

Phillip According to Jimmy:  He did a great job with Usher song but the second song he could take or leave. Phillip should be in the finale.

Colton According to Jimmy: Gaga was completely wrong for him and his look was too weird, but he can come back. He just needs to regroup and get better songs.

Verdict: Jessica is safe. Phillip is safe. Colton in bottom three.

Final Verdict

All the way through the show, I thought that at the end they were going to eliminate two people since last week the “save” was used. But then I realized that they don’t have to do that…Jermaine’s abrupt departure of the show is now equalized.

Elise is safe.

HOLLIE (??!?!) is safe.

And just like that, Colton was voted off.

Even though Renee had warned me that it was coming, I still felt a measure of disbelief…and then when he responded to his ousting, I was kind of not surprised that “America” sent him home.  Honestly, I think it was his whole approach and the way he portrayed himself that made people not want to vote for him, because his music was brilliant. In fact, now that you all know that I am an Idol music downloading fool, I have to say that Colton’s version of “September” hit my top 5 list of downloaded singles from the show. I’d say the list probably goes like this:

1. “Heartless” by Kris Allen

2. “Heard It Through the Grapevine” by Casey Abrams

3. “September” by Colton Dixon

4. “You Give Love a Bad Name” by Blake Lewis

5. “Mad World” by Adam Lambert

Before they rolled the video of his time on Idol, Colton told us that he wasn’t himself last night and apologized. But my real question is, who was he winking at during the exit video? And then with an awkward handhold/shake from Ryan, he was on his way.

To console myself I made myself a little “I’ll Miss Colton” playlist on my iPod.Were you shocked by Colton’s ousting? And who do you want to win it all?

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