Immunity 101

I don’t feel like I get sick all the time, but today is one of those days that I’m home from work in an effort to keep the office a germ-free space.

First of all, being a sick adult is not as much fun as being a sick kid. When I was sick as a kid, my Mom would make me Cream of Wheat and admonish me every few minutes to drink fluids and bring me my medicine when it was time. As an adult, I have to make my own Cream of Wheat (which more often than not doesn’t happen because it takes a lot of effort and it never tastes as good as Mom’s), I have to remember to drink fluids, and it’s up to me to make sure my DayQuil isn’t expired and that I take it at the proper intervals, even when I’m in a foggy haze. Also, as a kid, I’d camp out on the couch with my pillow and a blanket to watch movies/TV. Nowadays, I don’t even OWN a couch, so there’s that.

Nevertheless, when I feel something coming on here are the steps I take to combat it:

1. I sleep. I’m not a nap person and never really have been, but when I’m sick I nap. So, when people say, “You’re sick, huh? Are you going to take what those germs are giving you lying down?” I say “Yes.” Because my body needs rest. Just remember that.

2. I drink. Some people try to drink their troubles away with alcohol, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. Aside from the occasional dosage of NyQuil, that is. I’m talking about juice, water, 7-Up, fruit smoothies, etc. I try to think of it this way: the fluids are like a big water hose that a fireman might use. I’m blastin’ the sickness from here to forever, and that’s AWESOME.

3. I limit my interactions with the outside world. First of all, no one likes to get sick because the sick person wasn’t considerate enough to keep the sickness to themselves. But also, I find that decongestants tend to make me a little loopy sometimes. It’s best if I limit my contact with,  you know, people in order for me to maintain my friendships.

4. I take my vitamins. I’ve never been a very good vitamin person, but recently I discovered these gummy vitamins that must have been dropped to us from heaven. They actually taste good and make me feel like a child. And everyone knows that you need your vitamins to keep yourself feeling well.

So there you have it. A sure-fire way to deal with sickness. Kids, you know what a NOT sure-fire way to deal with sickness is? Pretend to have a fever by putting the thermometer near a heating vent and then use blueberry chapstick to really sell it. Trust me. That does not work.

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